Missing You



I miss you.


Silly you, happy you, interested you.

I'm learning to live with

distracted you, frightened you, silent you,

parts of you I knew from before

but different now.

Bigger.

Darker.

Even your face,

the face I love so much,

changes daily

as your body adapts

and absorbs

and rebels against

the meds.

Sometimes I catch a glimpse of you,

the you from before the diagnosis.

I live for those sometimes.

They comfort and fill me

and get me through,

until the next time.


But today I see you:

sick

sore

self-conscious

uncomfortable you,

in your

expanding

deflating

tired body.

I know

you miss you too.

We're like roommates now,

in love with the same man,

lying quietly in the dark

missing you

praying for your return

fearing you're gone forever.


For Char.


Written in 2010 for my caregiver website, "Don't Lose Heart."

Copyright 2022 ©Jean Fogelberg

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